I went to a party once and everyone was supposed to pitch in some money to buy adderall. I had never tried or even heard of it but I was young and stupid so I gave them 20 bucks. Later on, after we all took it, everybody was going crazy and having a good time and I was just sitting on the couch quietly so I googled ‘adderall’ on my phone and learned that it’s used to treat ADHD.
I have ADHD.
I paid 20 dollars to calm down.
my grandfather always had candy in his pockets, and one time when I got really sick and I was hospitalized my dad told him not to give me any candy. He pulled out his pockets to show he hadn’t even brought any and I got really sad but as soon as my dad walked out of the room he then proceeded to take off his hat and had 2 chewy chocolate candy toffees and 2 orange fanta toffees, and I’ll never forget the happiness and surprise I felt in that one moment in my entire life.
Cosmo Sex Tip #4565345
If your partner asks you to be louder during sex, seductively say, “GUH-HYUK” in the voice of Goofy, as loud as you can.
– Carl Sagan (via psych-facts)
this elevator does not go up or down it goes isosceles triangle and left
who the hell let willy wonka design another elevator
Fun fact: if you say “what’s so special about Scott McCall” three times in front of the mirror, Derek shows up with a power point and recorded speech.
FUN STORY: my grandma lives in a city that was currently taken over by drug dealers and gangs and it’s now divided in two and my grandma is the oNLY CITIZEN IN THE WHOLE CITY who can go walking freely through both sides of the town because she used to do community work and feed the poor kids and those gang members were all fed by her so they let her come and go as she wants SO WHAT WE LEARN TODAY IS TO BE FUCKING NICE TO KIDS BC U MIGHT BE DEALING W FUTURE GANG MEMBERS
In Soviet Russia, kitten adopts YOU.
You can’t possibly say no to that.
"I HAVE SELECTED MY HUMAN. WE CAN NOW LEAVE THIS PLACE. HUMAN. SIGN THE REQUIRED PAPERWORK."